Born into Freedom?

Are we born into freedom or slavery?
This presents and interesting conundrum that I've been pondering over for quite some time now.

The moment our eyes open into this god awful world, we're free. Free from a sub-life, depend like a parasite on another human being. We fight to be free from the womb and just for a split second we're no one. Our only identity is our gender, and if we got all our limbs intact. Nothing is expected from us and we owe no one anything.

Then it happens.

In the next few seconds that ensue, we get a name, we're tagged and in the following days, dreams are built around us. We're already designated to be something, from something as simple as an an engineer or an accountant, to something redundant as a christian or a muslim to something vague as a good person, a guitarist, a vegetarian, a spiritualist and the list goes on.
we're trapped.
Trapped by expectations set by the very people that spat us out into the world.
we can rarely escape these expectations, because being raised in them for as long as we've been alive does cause a lasting groove in our mind, a sort of pre-conditioning to the very factors that trap us.
Many of us go on to live fully "satisfying" lives without ever waking up to the puppets that we truly are.

I ask you, are you satisfied? And I'm sure your answer is that you are.
but really, can a person who has only ever eaten one flavor of ice-cream say it is his favorite and it completely satisfies him?

It confounds me that people will apply this logic to EVERYTHING inconsequential but not to things like relationships, religions and things that actually matter.

I want to truly live, but is it possible to really be alive being surrounded by people who'd rather use they brain to decide which flip flops are better?

*sigh.
This race is doomed.

Desmond Loves the Darkness.

Its like an inexplicable tendency to lean towards the darkness. I've always been so, the darker, the more fascinated I am by it.
We've already related to those vigilantes and those lead characters with a morality that strictly more than a hundred shades of grey. I don't just relate to them, I become them.

So far recessed into the small pockets of my own mind, I can no longer differentiate between whats real and what's seemingly an imaginary demon sitting aside me staring at me.
It should be imaginary right? Or i may just be losing my mind. His cold blue eyes staring into my soul as to stake claim to it, isn't helping my nerves.

We all are capable of incredible feats of rage and destruction. Let me stop here and bring in a concept of an eastern religion, oh wait, some of the blind enough followers don't like to think of it as a religion now, they're a bunch of idiots.
There's a differentiation one can derive from the brain and mind that goes through periods of extreme self inflicted torture and from the one that resides inside that recognizes these as torture. If you can't live with yourself, who is it that you can't live with? therefore there exists a dichotomy in thought and being.

Now if my mind and brain are capable of ultimate destruction, and the part of me that we'll refer to as a soul recognizes that, it will seek to destroy the latter. I know this for a fact, because it has already begun. The soul is already eating away at the mind making the destruction turn inward in a way wherein there wont be any innocent bystanders.

The existentialist crisis may just claim me yet, or i may just be too dead to notice.

My Sins? Am I redeemed?

I don't mean to troll. I honestly and sincerely don't, but i have to ask.
Can ANYONE explain the true meaning of Good Friday to me.

Now don't get me wrong, I was born a Christian and am quite the bible scholar, so I know the historical record of what happened (as the Bible records it) but what i cannot seem to come to terms with, is pretty elemental.

Let us for a minute separate the old testament from the New testament, you know, to get all the looting, homicide and infanticide out of the way.
Now, the records say, Jesus died on the cross to for our sins or well, the Church sure interprets it that way right? Died for my sins and the sins of Mankind, but wait, wasn't there a clause by him earlier, stating something along the lines of "Do not judge lest ye be judged"? Does not him dying for my sins also mean him calling me a sinner first? Is he able to cast the first proverbial stone because he himself is free from sin? Isn't that tad petty for the Son of God?

But that is just one side of this ill fated event.

What real world implications did that one event have. He died for the sins of mankind.
Does that absolve me from going to Hell? The Church says NO.
Does this mean that the souls in hell up to that point in history were set free and taken in to heaven? This would mean Genghis Khan now lives next to St. Francis Xavier (and if you are a history buff, you already know they both probably are neighbors right now too). The Church says NO here too.
In a fit of sheer desperation, I ask, does this mean that original sin was absolved? NO!

I as a rational human admit to being a bit confused about this whole ordeal.

If you amputate the "spiritual" portions of this whole event which require faith, what REALLY did him dying on the cross achieve? What ultimate purpose does it solve?

The only thing I could think of, was it was compulsory for it to happen to satisfy scripture. For it was written that a human would be born of virgin womb, greater than a prophet, the savior of this world. He would absolve the sins of Mankind and generally set things right. This scripture was then again received through a series of visions to earlier prophets, whether Jew, Muslim or Christian. This would imply, with horrific ramifications that God desired his Son (who wasn't born yet) to be born and to die, even though in his infinite knowledge, would know that it would serve no real purpose, because what transpired in the subsequent millennium is now known as the dark ages of the Church.


So I honestly implore you, if you have a deeper understanding of this subject, please educate me, mail me if you must! I'm all ears to a different opinion.