The Not Me Mes

If Weve ever had the pleasure of being alone for sometime, maybre over coffee or dinner, i manage to fool most people into a feeling of brotherhood and understanding. I manage to play multiple roles lifetime membership in club of wonderland. Ever since i remember i’ve always been fascinated with fantasies and being able to spin a good tale that feels so true, you could feel the fabric of it if you only held out your hand.
To compensate for my inate ability to spin parallel universes, i’ve been blessed with a strong core, that never lets me, even for a second believe in the universe i’ve spun. I’ve been everything from a boorish lad who sits with his legs up, yelling cuss words in local languages, to someone who never uses any bad languange. I’ve been someone completely into high class music and someone who’s into music that is more often associated with the well, not so high class.
After much deliberation into why i feel the need to play roles, i’ve resigned myself to thinking i do that, because it helps me hide. I hate being noticed, i hate being on the spot, i’ve always hated being different. Being exactly as whoever im with helped me blend into the crowd which then fed my secondary perrogatives, ie, to observe and analyze the behaviour of other around me.
The roles i play arent completely alien from my being, they definitely exist, albiet in smaller quantities and similarly, i can never play a role that im not even 1 percent of. Thus to play a role, all i do is over amplify the exact qualities required. Hence, the 27 sides of desmond (in connection with a prior post of me having 27 personalities)
The tricky part is when someone breaches the levels of outer combination of personalities i’ve concocted. That rare instance where i feel i can trust someone enough to have everything rest and be as is.
The weird part? This works for me. Brilliantly.
Leads me to believe my own brain is subonciously pulling of the greatest con job ever by keeping me in 28th universe and leading me to believe im doing an accurate job with the first 27th.